its been two weeks — or two nights — since realizing, acknowledging and reaching out to God about my free nights while Josh is away. I felt stuck. stuck by boredom/lost/lonely/excited/free/clock staring/immobility….. I prayed hard and with laser focus. It finally hit me. I felt like I was behind a wall and I was the only person that saw/put the wall there. I prayed God would give me the freedom and care for a night by myself, a gracious heart that would focus on the positives of free nights and the room to miss Joshel. I prayed for Gods guidance and for him to take over my mind and heart on those evenings so I wouldnt just be overcoming this hill but I would be realigning with God and spending my time the way he called me to do! 

He answered. So plainly. Thank you Lord!!!! I didnt waste any time going home (which was always a time suck for me) and went straight to the mall. I found just what I needed and didnt feel guilty for wasting my entire night wasting and then getting home late. I took my makeup off right away and did a mask. I did a little laundry but not all of it because it simply doesnt need to be done! I enjoyed BB in real time instead of wasting time and always saving it for later… why do i always save for later to savor? I can savor for longer in real time AND enjoy texting with joshel about the updates. Thank you God for being so plain lately. You guide me and I need to watch for it!!! Thank you! I love you!!!

Im also thankful for this new concealer I bought. Its awesome.


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